Wednesday, September 13, 2006

Exclusive Meteorites in Kiwistan?

It seems Allah/God/G-d/Yahweh isn’t happy with the Kiwis. Yesterday a large object from outer space swept across South Island, reaching top speeds of around 40,000 km per hour. The meteor apparently entered the earth’s atmosphere, making a loud booming noise and causing the ground to shake. The meteor disintegrated before falling into a field.

Pity the poor sheep.

Fairfax ’s Christchurch-based paper The Press described it as Boom time in the sky. The Auckland-based New Zealand Herald described it as the “Daddy of all booms”.

So why are the gods throwing meteors at the Kiwis? Perhaps the prayers of members of the Exclusive Brethren sect have come true. Yesterday’s NZ Herald reported Kiwi PM Helen Clark’s attempts to limit secret political donations. She admits her Bill is aimed directly at secret donations and independent campaigns supporting the National party.

Apparently, the Brethren have told Kiwistan’s electoral commission that they wish to spend a whopping $1.2 million to support the National Party. Presently, Kiwis are allowed to make anonymous donations without political parties having to declare the source or donations of upto $NZ10,000. Clarke wants to reduce this threshold to donations above a mere $NZ250.

Of course, the Exclusive Brethren donors didn’t donate on behalf of their church but did so as private individuals.

Nats have dismissed any suggestion of collusion with the sect. They haven’t ruled out supporting the Bill but say they want to see the detailed Bill first.

However, one question remains unanswered. Was it really a comet that hit South Island ? Or was it Pluto exacting revenge over a long distance? I doubt even the sheep will be able to answer that question.

© Irfan Yusuf 2006

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